Maladaptive Schemas: What They Are and How They Affect Our Lives By Susan George

Have you ever found yourself repeating the same patterns in relationships, work, or personal life, despite your best efforts to change? The answer might lie in understanding maladaptive schemas, which are deeply rooted patterns and beliefs that influence how we perceive the world and ourselves. We’ll look at what maladaptive schemas are, how they develop, and how they affect our day-to-day life.

Understanding Schemas

Before we look into maladaptive schemas, let’s first understand what schemas are in general. In psychology, a schema is a cognitive framework or blueprint that helps us organise and interpret information. Schemas are fundamental frameworks that shape how we view the world, ourselves, and our interactions with others.

These mental frameworks begin to take shape early in life and continue to evolve as we grow and experience new things. They act as filters through which we process new information and make sense of our surroundings. While schemas can be helpful in many ways, such as enabling us to respond and categorise situations quickly. However, when they are maladaptive, they can lead to significant emotional and psychological distress. 

Maladaptive Schemas: What Are They?

Maladaptive schemas are deeply ingrained patterns of behaviour and thinking that are self-defeating and dysfunctional. They arise in early childhood and continue developing throughout life, often leading to negative outcomes. These schemas are typically triggered by situations that bring up memories of early negative experiences, causing emotional distress and maladaptive behaviours. Unlike healthy schemas that help us navigate life effectively, maladaptive schemas often result in self-defeating patterns and mental anguish.

How Do Maladaptive Schemas Develop?

Understanding the origins of maladaptive schemas is the first step in addressing and overcoming them. There are three primary factors that contribute to the development of these schemas:

• Unmet Emotional Needs

One of the primary reasons for the formation of maladaptive schemas is the failure to meet a child’s basic emotional needs. These needs include:

• Secure attachment: feeling safe, stable, and nurtured
• Autonomy: developing a sense of identity and competence
• Freedom to express feelings and needs
• Spontaneity and play: the ability to be carefree and enjoy life
• Realistic limits and self-control

When these needs are consistently unmet during childhood, it can lead to the development of maladaptive schemas as a way to cope with or make sense of the emotional deprivation.

• Early Childhood Experiences

Our early experiences play a significant role in shaping our schemas. Maladaptive schemas can form when a child:

• Is deprived of essential parenting values, particularly love and affection
• Experiences trauma or harm
• Observes and internalises their parents’ behaviours and attitudes
• Is required to meet their own needs excessively, beyond what’s age-appropriate

These experiences create a foundation for how we view ourselves, others, and the world around us. When these experiences are predominantly negative or traumatic, maladaptive schemas are more likely to develop.

• Emotional Temperament

It’s important to note that not all children exposed to similar environments develop the same schemas. This is where emotional temperament comes into play. Each individual has a unique temperament that influences how they respond to their environment. For example, one child might become withdrawn in response to emotional abuse, while another might become aggressive. These temperamental differences can lead to the development of different maladaptive schemas, even in similar circumstances.

Types of Maladaptive Schemas

Jeffrey Young, a prominent psychologist, identified 18 early maladaptive schemas that are commonly seen in individuals. Here, we will explore these schemas:

1. Abandonment: The belief that significant others will leave, resulting in a pervasive sense of loneliness and anxiety. This schema often leads to clingy behaviours or avoidance of relationships to prevent anticipated abandonment.
2. Mistrust/Abuse: The belief that others will harm, deceive, or manipulate. Individuals with this schema are often guarded and defensive, making it difficult to form trusting relationships.
3. Emotional Deprivation: The belief that one’s need for emotional support will never be met. This schema is rooted in early experiences of neglect or lack of affection.
4. Defectiveness/Shame: The belief of being inherently flawed, worthless, or unlovable. People with this schema often feel shame and avoid close relationships to prevent others from discovering their perceived flaws.
5. Social Isolation/Alienation: The belief of being isolated and different from others. Individuals with this schema feel alienated and often withdraw from social interactions to avoid rejection.
6. Dependence/Incompetence: The belief that one cannot handle daily life without significant help from others. This schema leads to excessive reliance on others and a lack of confidence in one’s abilities.
7. Vulnerability to Harm/Illness: The belief that catastrophe is imminent and one is always at risk. This schema results in chronic anxiety and avoidance of activities perceived as risky.
8. Enmeshment/Underdeveloped Self: The belief that one must be closely involved with significant others to the point of losing their own identity. This schema leads to over-dependence on relationships for a sense of self.
9. Failure: The belief that one will inevitably fail in important areas of life. This schema results in chronic self-doubt and a fear of trying new things.
10. Entitlement/Grandiosity: The belief that one is superior to others and entitled to special treatment. This schema can lead to selfish behaviours and conflicts in relationships.
11. Insufficient Self-Control/Self-Discipline: The difficulty with controlling impulses or urges, resulting in risk-taking behaviours or expressing feelings in an extreme manner. People with this schema often give up on tasks when they become too hard.
12. Subjugation: The act of giving over control to others to allow them to make decisions due to the belief of oneself being weak and others being stronger. People with this schema often feel powerless in their situations or relationships.
13. Self-Sacrifice: The belief that the needs of others are more important and must be fulfilled at all costs, to the detriment of one’s own happiness or well-being. People with this schema believe that caring for themselves is selfish and feel guilty for doing so.
14. Approval-Seeking/Recognition-Seeking: The act of trying excessively to achieve the approval, praise, or attention of others or trying to fit in at the cost of developing one’s own true feelings or identity. This schema leads to an insatiable need for external validation.
15. Negativity/Pessimism: The tendency to focus on the negative aspects of life and always expect the worst. People with this schema often accumulate an extensive number of traumatic or negative events, creating a bias towards pessimism.
16. Emotional Inhibition: The need to excessively inhibit spontaneous feelings, actions, or communication to avoid feelings of dislike or shame. This schema results in flat affect, unreadable facial expressions, and a presence of aloofness.
17. Unrelenting Standards/Hypercriticalness: The belief that one must work excessively hard to meet very high standards for behaviour and achievement to avoid criticism from oneself or others. This schema leads to perfectionism and chronic pressure to perform.
18. Punitiveness: The belief that people should be harshly punished for mistakes. People with this schema struggle to forgive themselves and others, often engaging in self-punishing behaviours.

The Impact of Maladaptive Schemas on Our Lives

Maladaptive schemas can  have a significant impact on our relationships, self-worth, mental health, and overall functioning, among other areas of our lives:

• Relationships

Maladaptive schemas often play out in our relationships with others. For example, someone with an abandonment schema might be overly clingy in relationships or push people away before they can be abandoned. Those with a mistrust/abuse schema might have difficulty forming close relationships due to a constant fear of being hurt or betrayed.

• Self-Esteem and Self-Worth

Schemas like defectiveness or failure can significantly impact one’s self-esteem. People with these schemas often have a deeply ingrained belief that they are flawed, inadequate, or incapable of success. This can lead to self-sabotage and a reluctance to pursue goals or opportunities.

• Career and Performance

Schemas related to competence and achievement can affect one’s career trajectory and overall performance. For instance, someone with an unrelenting standards schema might be a perfectionist at work, leading to burnout and stress. Many health professionals fall within this category. On the other hand, someone with a failure schema might avoid taking on challenging tasks or promotions due to a fear of not measuring up.

• Emotional Regulation

Many maladaptive schemas influence how we process and express emotions. Those with an emotional inhibition schema might struggle to express their feelings openly, while those with an insufficient self-control schema might have difficulty managing their emotional responses.

• Coping Mechanisms

Maladaptive schemas often lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms. For example, someone with a social isolation schema might avoid social situations altogether, reinforcing their belief that they don’t fit in. Those with a self-sacrifice schema might constantly put others’ needs before their own, leading to burnout and resentment.

• Mental Health

Persistent maladaptive schemas can contribute to various mental health issues, including depression, anxiety, and personality disorders. They can create a cycle of negative thoughts and behaviours that reinforce the schema, making it difficult to break free without intervention.

Identifying and Addressing Maladaptive Schemas

The first step to changing your maladaptive schemas is acknowledging them. Here are some signs that you might be operating under the influence of a maladaptive schema:

• Recurring patterns in relationships or work that lead to dissatisfaction
• Intense emotional reactions that don’t seem appropriate for the situation
• Persistent negative beliefs about oneself or other people
• Difficulty changing behaviours despite recognising their negative impact
• Feeling confined or stuck in certain areas of your life

If you identify with these signs, it might be helpful to explore your schemas further. Here are some steps you can take:

1. Self-Reflection: Take time to reflect on your patterns of thought and behaviour. Try to identify recurring themes or beliefs that might be influencing your actions.
2. Journaling: Writing about your experiences, thoughts, and feelings can help you uncover underlying schemas and patterns.
3. Professional Help: A therapist trained in Schema Therapy can help you identify your maladaptive schemas and develop strategies to overcome them.
4. Education: Learn more about the different types of schemas and how they manifest. This knowledge can help you recognise your own schemas more easily.
5. Challenging Beliefs: Once you’ve identified a schema, start questioning the beliefs associated with it. Are they based on facts or distorted perceptions from your past?
6. Behaviour Change: Work on gradually changing behaviours that reinforce your maladaptive schemas. This might involve stepping out of your comfort zone or trying new ways of interacting with others.
7. Self-Compassion: Remember that schemas developed as a way to cope with difficult circumstances. Be patient and kind to yourself as you work on changing these long-standing patterns.

Conclusion

Maladaptive schemas are deeply ingrained patterns of thought and behaviour that can significantly impact our lives. They develop early in life as a result of unmet emotional needs, traumatic experiences, and our individual emotional temperaments. While these schemas can be persistent and challenging to change, understanding them is the first step towards breaking free from their influence. By recognising our maladaptive schemas and their effects on our lives, we can begin to challenge these beliefs and develop healthier ways of thinking and behaving. This process often requires patience, self-reflection, and sometimes professional help, but the rewards of overcoming maladaptive schemas can be transformative.